CW REPUBLIC CHAMPIONSHIP - TRIPLE THREAT

“I think we need to try a different approach 7800.” 2600 says as he is sitting in the passenger seat of the MCC as 7800 is now the captain of the MCC. He even bought himself a captains hat.

“The Dark Yamauchi are proving to be tougher than we originally thought.”

“Dilly dilly.”

“Yes 7800. The Toku Yamauchi have really thrown a wrench in our plans. If we are to capture sections 2 and section 3 of the Energon Devise, then we have to figure out how to defeat all four of the Yamauchi.”

“Dilly dilly” 7800 says as he holds up his fist and makes a mean face, or at least we think it’s a mean face. He is after all, wearing a mask.

“We have tried the brutal strength route 7800. Three times in fact.”

“Dilly dilly.”

“Yes 7800! Three times! We have been defeated by the Dark Yamauchi and now, This Toku Yamauchi faction. 3 times in a row 7800 we have failed to capture the 2 sections of the Energon Devise that we have swore to track down, taken an oath to capture  the Energon Device from our enemies in order to secure the national security of this great country and defeat any threat to our freedoms and to our economy. We have failed the American people 3 times 7800. I am ashamed of that. I lie awake at night just thinking about that.”

“Dilly dilly.”

2600 crosses his arms and looks out the window of the MCC as they are rumbling down the highway on a undisclosed highway in America. “Flashback 2 has nothing to do with that. I have made peace with that.”

Clearly still a sore subject for 2600, he sits in silence as 7800 expertly drives that MCC.
After 5 minutes, 7800 breaks the silence.

“Dilly dilly?”

“You should be! We are out here to do a job 7800! One that we are failing at! We lost at Battle of Starpower. We lost at the Battle of Walk of Fame, and again we regrouped and re engaged the enemy in at Walk of Fame and most recently, we lost at the Battle of No Love Lost. Mission Republic is starting to be a huge failure. Did we train all of those years to be a failure?”

“Dilly dilly.”

“Lives are at stake! Our way of life is at stake and you just want to make jokes? We must! MUST! Slide of our chips into the center of the table at Battle of Puroresu! We can not fail on the battlefield again! We simply can not!”

7800 looks at 2600 and look at the road. He then cuts across 3 lanes of highway to take the exit off of the highway. 2600 looks at 7800 as if he has gone mad.

“What are you doing? 7800? This is not the way to Hollywood.”

7800 says nothing and once off the exit ramp he pulls the MCC off of the road and into the dirt and gravel along the road. He unfastens his seatbelt and leaps out of the chair and slugs 2600 right in the jaw! 2600 drops the notepad he was holding and is stunned by what 7800 just did to him. 7800 unfastens 2600’s seatbelt and takes the lap belt and wraps it around 2600’s neck and starts to choke him! 2600 tries to fight out of this, he slaps 7800’s hand on the belt, he pushes back on 7800, using his legs to back him up, and in a last ditch effort, 2600 kicks his leg up and over his head, using the dash of the MCC to kick 7800 in the head! 7800 stumbles backwards into the second part of the MCC and catches himself on table. As 2600 tries to quickly catch his breath, 7800 takes a hold of him and slings him towards the back part of the MCC.

A couple of second later, the side door of the MCC flies open as 7800 threw 2600 into it! 2600 lands on the hard ground outside of the MCC and 7800 steps down to the second step just inside the MCC. With 2600 laying on his back, 7800 leaps towards him with a double ax handle smash, but 2600 lifts his boot and 7800 eats it! 7800, still on his feet is holding his face as 2600 rolls onto his stomach and starts to crawl away from 7800. 7800 sees this, and runs towards him, leaps into the air and goes to land a double foot stomp on 2600, but 2600 rolls out of the way at the last second, and then sweeps the feet out from under 7800 planting him on his back! 2600 now starts to get to his feet, as is 7800, but 7800 gets himself a handful of dirt which 2600 doesn’t see.

“Come on 7800! Let’s see if you can beat...DAMN IT!”

7800 spins around and slings the dirt into 2600’s eyes, blinding him. 2600 holds his eyes as 7800 with a running knee lift on 2600! 7800 with a spear on 2600 planting him hard into the ground! 7800 takes a hold of 2600 hand, and places his foot in 2600’s armpit, holding his hand extended upwards. He twists his arm around as far as it will go. 2600 lets out a scream, 7800 bends his middle finger backwards till it touches the back of his wrist, which 2600 doesn’t like. 7800 then bends his thumbs as far back as it will.

“Dilly dilly.” 7800 says as he then lifts 2600 up by his twisted hand and drives him back down to the ground with his foot still in his armpit! 2600 clutches his hand.

“Dilly dilly!” 7800 shouts at him.

“I never said it was your fault!”

“Dilly dilly!”

“WE!!!! WE FAILED! I never once said it was your fault!”

7800 kicks 2600 in the gut. “Dilly dilly!” 7800 says as he points at 2600. “Dilly dilly!” he follows up with as he points away from himself. He is all fired up.

2600 is gasping for air after getting a swift hard kick. He is trying to get back to his feet.

“Perhaps!” 2600 says as he sits up on his knees. “I misspoke.”

7800 winds up and kicks him Daniel Bryan style right across the chest. 2600 holds his chest as it hurt like hell.

“If I did, then I am sorry. I just take great pride…”

7800 winds up to kick 2600 again, this time 2600 catches his leg, and leg whips him down to the ground! 2600 quickly hooks his leg around 7800’s leg and applies the STFU on 7800 and locking his fingers together under 7800’s chin! As 2600 pulls back on his neck, 7800 tries to fight it off, but to no luck.

“IN WHAT I DO 7800! I HAVE DEVOTED MY WHOLE LIFE TO DEFEATING THE YAMAUCHI! I WILL NOT REST TILL THEY ARE DEAD AND BURIED! THE ONLY LIFE GOAL I HAVE IS TO SECURE ALL 5 PIECES OF THE ENERGON DEVICE! I DON’T CARE HOW MANY BATTLES WE HAVE TO HAVE! WE WILL DEFEAT THE DARK YAMAUCHI!”

7800 can’t take the pain anymore, he finally taps 2600’s forearms and 2600 breaks the hold. 7800 holds the back of his neck as he is face first in the dirt as 2600 holds his ribcage.

“With or without you, I will go to battle this week, next week, next month, next year, over and over if I have too. I will not rest till Toku and Dark Yamauchi are defeated and I have secured the two pieces of the Energon Device! If you choose to help me. To be my partner, my brother. Great! Otherwise….”

“Dilly dilly.”

2600 looks at 7800. He smirks. He smacks 7800 on the back of the head.

“Good choice 7800. I knew I could trust you.”

“Dilly dilly.”

2600 laughs and it hurts. “You wish! Even with the element of surprise, I still won.”

“Dilly dilly.”

“Yeah, okay. Next time. I heard that the last time.”

2600 slowly gets to his feet and stands over 7800 who rolls onto his back. 2600 extends his hand.

“Come on! Partner. We’ve got to get back on the road for we have some Yamauchi ass to kick!”

“Dilly dilly.”

“Roger that!”

And with that, 2600 helps 7800 back to his feet.
Fade out.

The scene slowly faded into view, revealing the duo of ‘The Toku Titan!’ Geki Nitoh and ‘YOUR Favorite Drug’ Xavier Laroux, collectively known as The Toku Addiction. Both of them sat, cross legged, upon the cool grass of the park they inhabited. Geki would occasionally breath in deeply before exhaling in an almost euphoric state. On the other hand, Xavier looked almost bothered by the whole scenario. As if being able to sense it, Geki slowly reopened his eyes, turning his head to look at his tag partner. Before he’d be able to speak, Laroux would speak first.

’Just what is this suppose to accomplish?’

’It’s mostly breathing exercises but it doubles to help you resolve any potentially distracting issues you have running around up there. I know you were pretty bothered by the fact that Team Atari is in the match as well.’

Before Geki could continue on that topic, Xavier waved the thought off, rolling to a kneel and then pushing his palms into that grass, rising up to a standing position.

’Bothered? Nah, that don’t even touch it. It’s total shit, man. We won the contendership match. We are the contenders. If Outdated Tech can’t even get past us, the up and comin team on the scene, why the fuck do they deserve to get a direct shot at the belts? They were put up against us to see who deserves a shot and guess what? We proved that they don’t deserve a shot.’

Shaking his head, Laroux paused his diatribe long enough to run his opened palm across the top of his head.

’We deserve that direct, one team against one team, shot. Ya had El Gotho talkin on Twitter like he’s better than us just cause they beat us. They wouldn’t have beat us if we hadn’t already spent thirty fuckin minutes knockin Outdated Tech from corner to corner.’

Geki brought his hand up in a defensive manner, shaking his head. A look of reassurance growing across his features as he made his way back up to a stand. Bringing the both of his hands up and behind his head, he laced his fingers, resting them against the back of his head.

’Look, I don’t like that anymore than you do but that’s the hand we’ve been dealt. We have to play it to the best of our abilities. And look on the plus side, not only has our opponents changed slightly, but we don’t even have to pin The Dark. We can manage to find an opening and finish off Team Atari. We already know their best and we know we can beat it. There’s going to be so much going on, The Dark has to be at their absolute best if they want to walk away still Republic Champions.’

A firm, confident nod was given from Geki.

’And as I just said, we’re not facing the combination of Dona Rotten and Equinox. We’re facing Dona and Jimmy Pagan…’

As soon as that name left his mouth, Laroux scoffed rather loudly, interrupting Geki. That arrogant smirk crept across his features as he shook his head.

’Fuckin Jimmy Pagan. Y’know what I hate the absolute most bout this business, Geki?’

Without waiting for Geki to respond, Laroux continued on.

’It’s the fuckin whack jobs who think they’re supernatural. They slap on some fuckin face paint that makes ICP’s look almost artsy start callin’emselves stupid shit like Bastard Prince. Guys like Jimmy Pagan. I mean, let’s be honest. No matter how you talk on Twitter. No matter what theatrics you use. No matter what you think you are. You’re no better than I am. You wipe your ass just the same as I do. You’re not special. There’s literally nothin that separates you from the rest of the Hot Topic models runnin around in this fuckin business.’

By time he finished with what he was saying, there was a look of pure disgust on the features of Laroux. Turning his head to the side, he spit off to the side. This was where Geki took over.

’But what about Dona Rotten?’

’Eddy’s ole lady.’

’How she dresses and acts aside, she’s the real deal when it comes to what she does in that ring. Dona Rotten..’

’Eddy’s ole lady.’

Geki looked at Xavier out of the corner of his eye for a moment before returning his gaze to the man holding the camera.

’Don..’

’Eddy’s ole lady.’

Finally, Geki had to say something after the constant interruptions from Xavier.

’Why do you keep doing that every time I say her name?’

Actually thinking about an answer to that question, Laroux shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly.

’Cause that’s all she is to me. I look at her and I don’t see the list of accomplishments that comes with her, not at all. I look at her and ALL I see is Eddy’s ole lady.’

Taking in a rather deep breath, Geki sighed out, slowly shaking his head. Usually, an almost disappointment would be sensed from him but this time, he laughed slightly.

’You love making people mad, don’t you?’

Laroux nodded, speaking up in that as a matter of factly tone.

’You goddamn right I do. I especially love it when people make it so easy to get under their skin. It shows I’m in their head and if I can get into their head, I can make them fuck up in the match. And if I can do that, that means winning is that much easier. We don’t get paid by the hour, y’know?’

Another slight laugh followed by a nod of agreement was given off by Geki.

’Well, what about Team Atari? Did you watch the video they posted?’

Laroux looked as if he couldn’t believe Geki would ask such a question.

’Of course I watched it. And y’know, I watched it expectin more. I wanted more than they put out in their match against us. Boy was I fuckin disappointed. I have no idea how anyone can get any semblance of entertainment from watchin those two jackoffs. I mean, c’mon now. I’ve been around the block more than a few times. I’ve seen my fair share of stupid personalities. I’ve heard more than my fair share of the stupidest shit you could possibly spew from your mouth but in all fuckin honesty? Outdated Tech takes the fuckin cake. I mean, they fuckin take it and mow down on it like a lil fat kid. I’ve never heard more incoherent ramblin in my entire fuckin life, man.’

’So, you don’t have a nice thing to say about anyone in the match who’s not us?’

’I don’t think the referee is gonna fuck up. Does that count?’

’That..that’s a start.’

Geki nodded approvingly only for Xavier to speak up.

’I mean, Eddy’s ole lady has a less than average rack.’

Laughing out rather loudly, Geki looked at Xavier in shock.

’Fox is going to choke you.’

’Pfft. I’m not gonna say she don’t get jealous but she damn sure ain’t gonna get jealous over fuckin strung out lookin Eddy’s ole lady. But when she does get jealous? Goddamn, don’t even get me started on how fuckin hot she gets.’

Geki was quick to change the subject before Xavier delved too deeply into the current topic.

’Nothing nice for anyone else?’

Thinking about it for a moment, Laroux angled his head to the side as he reached into the pocket of the track pants he wore, pulling out and lighting up a cigarette. Taking in a long drag, he exhaled out, turning to look at Geki.

’I’m sure Jimmy Pagan has a niceish vagina?’

’Okay!’

Turning to face the camera, Geki produced that child like smile as Xavier began to wander around a bit, smoking his cigarette.

’Despite what my partner thinks about this, I eagerly look forward to this match. We’ve proven ourselves against both teams and now we have another opportunity to do it again. Losing our first shot at the Republic Championships was hard, I won’t say it wasn’t. But, we picked ourselves back up and we’ve been pushing ourselves that much harder. We’re ready. Are you?’

From behind Geki, Xavier spoke up.

’Spoiler: they’re not.’

And with that, the scene slowly faded to black.